Parsimonious -- Frugal Is In

If ya got it, don't flaunt it. Wealth, that is. Not in this harsh economic climate when foreclosures, job losses, salary cuts, and unpaid furloughs have hit people across the demographic strata. Even well-heeled professionals earning comfortable six-figure incomes are choosing restaurants that offer half-price nights when they dine out and cutting back on clothes, entertainment, and other discretionary spending, according to a recent Washington Post article.

It's hard to look around a relatively wealthy area like the D.C. metro region -- to note the high per capita number of Beemers, Benzes, and Lexi; the Coach handbags on many a female teenagers' shoulder, the plethora of plastic surgery ads jostling for readers' eyeballs in local media -- and think bling is really out. Nonetheless, it looks like frugality is at least being invited to the party now, even if it's not being feted as the guest of honor.

Frugal is a term that people can accept, some grudgingly, some with chin out-thrust defiance, wearing it like a badge of honor. You can admiringly comment on your frugal mother's ability to feed a family of five on less than $100 a week. But I doubt frugal's lesser-known cousin parsimonious will attain any greater measure of coolness, let alone more frequent use, despite the times.

For one thing, it's a term that sounds antiquated. It makes me think of a poor country parson getting by on a meager salary, an image that has helped me remember the term's meaning all these years since I first encountered it in a high school vocabulary test.

For another thing, parsimonious is a term that has taken on a more derogatory meaning through the years than has frugal, even though it was an equally neutral term originally. The OED gives as the principal definition of parsimonious: "Characterized by parsimony; careful in the use or disposal of money or resources; sparing, saving." Its first definition of parsimony is: "Carefulness in the employment of money or material resources; saving or economic disposition. a. In a good or neutral sense." Only afterward comes, "b. In dyslogistic sense: Stinginess, niggardliness."

More dictionaries now emphasize that dyslogistic sense. E.g., the New Oxford American Dictionary defines parsimonious as: "Unwilling to spend money or use resources; stingy or frugal." Webster's Revised Unabridged Dictionary gives us: "Exhibiting parsimony; sparing in expenditure of money; frugal to excess; penurious; niggardly; stingy." The American Heritage College Dictionary offers: "Excessively sparing or frugal," and defines parsimony as: "Unusual or excessive frugality."

I can't help but think it's a pity for that imaginary country parson with whom I associate parsimonious; I've always envisioned him more like a Friar Tuck of Robin Hood fame than an Ebeneezer Scrooge. I hadn't thought it would be an insult to comment on my mother's parsimonious ways, such as running errands only two or three times a week in a carefully planned route that minimized mileage and gas usage, keeping junkmail by the phone to jot messages rather than a notepad; squashing the sliver of nearly used up soap onto the new bar so as not to waste that last bit; or using as coasters those once ubiquitous AOL discs we used to get in the mail every other week it seemed.

Oh, sure, parsimony can go to excess, as the infamous casserole crumb topping incident proves (a mixture of the crushed remnants at the bottoms of the bags of three different types of breakfast cereal -- including store-brand Raisin Bran -- that she didn't see the point of just throwing away). But the lessons she and my father taught us about spending our money wisely, keeping enough back to build up a tidy savings account and make investments, avoiding debt when possible and taking on only as much as we knew we could handle have all stood me and my siblings in good stead.

My parents' parsimony allowed them to send three kids through college and supported my extra years in grad school. They don't worry about losing their house or whether they can keep up with the bills. They splurge on themselves occasionally, yet still manage their resources carefully. I may not have grown up an immigrant starting from scratch to build a life out of a few opportunities and meager possessions, as my mother and her family did, and I don't salvage every sliver of soap or avoid every unnecessary car trip. But I learned from her and my father to willingly wear either parsimonious or frugal as a badge of honor.